In effect, we’re telling trans women that they are only deserving of secret interactions with men, further demeaning and stigmatizing trans women.
I’ve stood witness to many so-called scandals, mostly published on gossip blogs, where passing interactions with trans women spawn hundreds of headlines, particularly for a man with fame and social capital.
The Mister Cee “scandal” sheds light on society’s ignorance, similarly exhibited when Chris Brown, Chingy and Chad “Ochocinco” Johnson took photos with trans women; similarly exhibited when folks gender-policed Joseline Hernandez to the point where she Tweeted a nude photo to prove her cis-ness; similarly exhibited when Eddie Murphy, LL Cool J and a list of other powerful men were accused of being “caught” seeking trans women. When I was a girl finding myself, I was met with similar questions and believed I would never find someone to love me.
This anti-trans woman ideology is harmful, misogynistic and pervasive and travels way beyond the comments section of gossip blogs, and as Sylvia Rivera once said, “I will no longer put up with this shit.” I am a trans woman. I had learned that I was unworthy and undeserving, and it took me years to release myself from the shame and stigma society had forced upon me as a young woman.
Until we begin checking how we delegitimize the identities, bodies and existence of trans women and stigmatize the men who yearn to with us, we will continue to marginalize our sisters, pushing them further into socially-sanctioned invisibility, left in the dark to fend for themselves with men who don’t have the space to explore, define and embrace their attraction to various women. Be respectful of people’s identities, bodies and pronouns.
Misgendering, slurs, threats, anti-trans rhetoric and/or outright ignorance will not be tolerated.
I love when you ask me things to comply your fantasies, when we communicate and we give us pleasure mutually, Gentle Touches all over my body !
I'm the kind of girl that enjoys spending a good time with mannered men that know how to make her laugh, because I love those men with sense of humor!
He must do this to maintain his standing in our patriarchal society. Instead, we shame men who have this desire, from the boyfriends, cheaters and “chasers” to the “trade,” clients, and pornography admirers.We tell men to keep their attraction to trans women secret, to limit it to the internet, frame it as a passing fetish or transaction.A man’s desire for my body, my brain, my brilliance and my existence is not a laughing matter because I am not a joke.RELATED VIDEO: I appear with Laverne Cox on Huffpost Live to discuss loving trans women When I met my boyfriend Aaron and disclosed that I am trans, he did not question his sexuality.
Someone who loves to spoil me, make me feel special, take a good care of me.